<VV> Ed Cole

[JVHRoberts at aol.com]

"Wet Dream" by Kip Adotta
 
____________________________________
It was April the 41st, being a quadruple leap year
I was  driving in downtown Atlantis 
My barracuda was in the shop 
So I was in a  rented stingray, and it was overheating 

So I pulled into a Shell Station  
They said I'd blown a seal 
I said, "Fix the damn thing, and leave my  private life out of it, okay, 
pal?" 

While they were doing that I walked  over to a place called the Oyster Bar 
A real dive, but I knew the owner  
He used to play for the Dolphins 
I said "Hi, Gil!" 
You have to yell,  he's hard of herring 

Gil was also down on his luck 
Fact is he was  barely keeping his head below water 
I bellied up to the sandbar, he poured  me the usual 
Rusty snail, hold the grunion, shaken not stirred 
With a  peanut butter and jellyfish sandwich on the side, heavy on the mako 
I  slipped him a fin, on porpoise 

I was feeling good 
I even dropped a  sand dollar in the box for Jerry's squids, just for the 
halibut 

Well the  place was crowded 
We were packed in like sardines 
They were all there to  listen to the big band sounds of Tommy Dorsal 
What sole! 

Tommy was  rockin' the place with a very popular tuna 
"Salmon Chanted Evening" 
And  the stage was surrounded by screaming groupers 
Probably there to see the  bass player 

One of them was this cute little yellowtail, and she's  giving me the eye 
So I figured this is my chance -- You know, a piece of  Pisces!?! 

But she said things I just couldn't fathom 
She was too  deep, seemed to be under a lot of pressure 
Boy, could she drink! 
She  drank like a.......She drank a lot 
I said, "What's your sign?" 
She said,  "Aquarium." 
I said, "Let's Get Tanked!" 

Think I had a wet dream  
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream 
Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh 
Wet Dream!!! 

I  invited her to my place for a midnight bait 
I said, "Come on baby, it'll  only take a few minnows." 
She threw me that same old line, "Not tonight, I  gotta haddock." 

And she wasn't kidding either 
Cause in came the  biggest, meanest looking haddock 
I'd ever seen come down the pike 
He was  covered with mussels 

He came over to me and said, 
"Listen, shrimp,  don't you come trollin' around here!" 
What a crab! This guy was steamed!  
I could see the anchor in his eyes 

I turned to him, I said,  "A-balone! You're just being shellfish!" 
Well, I knew it was going to be  trouble, and so did Gil 
Because he was already on the phone to the cods  

The haddock hits me with a sucker punch 
I catch him with a left hook  
He eels over...it was a fluke...but there he was 
Flat as a  mackerel...kelpless 

I said, "Forget the cods Gil, this guy's gonna need  a sturgeon!" 

Well, the yellowtail was impressed with the way I landed  her boyfriend 
She came over to me 
She said, "Hey, big boy, you're really  a game fish. What's your name?" 
I said, "Marlin." 

I think I had a  wet dream 
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream 
Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh 
Wet Dream!!!  

Well from then on we had a whale of a time 
I took her to dinner, I  took her to dance 
I bought her a bouquet of flounders 
I went home with  her 
And what did I get for my trouble? 
A case of the clams!!! 

I  think I had a wet dream 
Cruisin' thru the Gulf Stream 
Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh  
Wet Dream!!! 

I think I had a wet dream 
Cruisin' thru the Gulf  Stream 
Ohhh Ohhh Ohhh 
Wet Dream!!! 



In a message dated 8/19/2005 5:23:17 P.M. Eastern Standard Time,  
rickjanet at charter.net writes:

Does  that mussel car come with a clam shell hood? How bout bait bucket 
seats?  Tow hook? Net cost? Didja troll for it?